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Legalized bestiality


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Jeb Hensarling Is A Carrot

jeb hensarlingBack in mid-April Arizona Republican Senator John Kyl very publicly made the claim that over 90 per cent of Planned Parenthood's business was abortion-related.

It's actually 3%.

When confronted with the truth Mr. Kyl's office responded that his statement "was not intended as a factual statement".

Ah.

Well, if that's what passes for acceptable truth from the boys on the right side of the aisle then I guess the following, a little trifle I whipped up, passes for political advocacy:

jeb hensarling is a carrot

This of course refers to Jeb "I am a carrot" Hensarling, my state representative, a man for whom no Conservative cause is too petty or mean-spirited to support with his vote.

I'd honestly like to see a sign like this on every street corner, joined by an unlimited variation on the theme, so go for it, people! It seems to me as long as the sign clearly states it's not a factual statement then we're clear to legally share whatever ridiculous message we choose. You know, like:

Kyl is 90% Gay
Boehner Drinks Anal Lube
Ron Paul Gnaws Newts
Paul Ryan is Heterosexual
Republican Are Fiscally Responsible

Run with this, people. I'm counting on you.

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Addendum: Today's comic was nothing more than a random riff on the bizarre subject of bestiality, but DAMN if Florida's Republican-led government didn't pass a law against it today that, uhhhh, accidentally made all sex in Florida illegal.

While in the process of pandering to their conservative base the GOP bone-heads in Florida just redefined bestiality as "An act relating to sexual activities involving animals."

You can easily see the problem here if you take your nose out of the Bible. Bascially:

Premise A: Humans are animals.

Premise B: Florida banned having sex with any animal.

Conclusion: It is illegal to have sex in Florida. Tah-dah!

Who said bestiality isn't funny?

=Lefty=

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john boehnerFebruary 10, 2011: "We're going to have a relentless focus on creating jobs." - John Boehner.

So far the list of GOP accomplishments for 2011 is:

(1) Attempted curtailing of abortion rights.
(2) Attempted defunding of Planned Parenthood.
(3) Attempted defunding of NPR.
(4) Investigating Muslims.
(5) Declaring English as America's Official Language.
(6) Reaffirming "In God We Trust". Yawn.
(7) Challenging AARP's tax-exempt status.
(8) Approved defunct funding for failed religious schools.
(9) Attempt to destroy Medicaid.
(10) Attempt to destroy Planned Parenthood
(11) Shutting down the government
(12) Attempt to destroy the EPA.
(13) Attempting to eliminate financial counseling.
(14) Passed a House budget that gives $4 trillion in tax cuts to the rich.
(15) Spend $500,000 to discriminate against gays.
(16) Continued toadying for the rich.
(17) Pretending the deficit is to blame for slow job growth.
(18) De-funded SETI. (ARGH!!!!!!!)
(19) Tried to kill Chrysler two years ago... which is now going to pay back all its government loans.
(20) The Judicial Branch of the GOP, the Supreme Court, votes 5-4 to deny consumer class-action suits.
(21) Redefining rape. Yes, redefining rape.
(22) Pushing for spending caps tied to GDP. Bad idea.
(23) Claimed credit for dropping oil prices because they passed a bill.
(24) Refuse to reduce oil subsidies.

Nope. No job creation here. Seriously. Not a fucking employment sausage. Move along. Move along.

I'll keep adding to this list until the Republican House does something to create jobs. I unhappily predict this is gonna be one lonnnnng list. After all, you don't get rid of a sitting president by helping the economy.

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Fox News Lies!And what manner of lie is Fox News spewing today? That cutting oil subsidies will raise gas prices. Pure, unadulterated bull-shit.

Click here to help Drop Fox from your cable system.


end rant

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What's in Mike's iPod?
"Jollity Farm" by The Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band



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MOON TOWN

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Today's Google Chow.

Acme Meats: While we have no ethical qualms against accepting your wife for processing, sir, might I suggest a traditional divorce? After all, no one really wants to eat anything that's had your wiener in it.

Caption: Although legalized bestiality livened up the tableau this was pretty much Acme Meats' response every time Vernon showed up.